So I haven't wrote in so long. I took a really long break but I am back. A lot has changed since this summer. Mark and I got back together and now we are getting married. He proposed by playing a song he had wrote for me and then asked me to play. When I sat down to play the piano, I lifted the top and there was the box. I was totally shocked, laughed for a second and then said yes. It still kinda floors me that i am getting married.

My sister had a baby boy on December 23rd. Kayden James Pickott. He weighed 9.5 lbs and is beautiful and healthy. He is already 2 months and smiling on his own. It is soo cute. He is such an amazing little guy.

Yeah life is different, but it is great.

I started a program called Celebrate Recovery to deal with and let go some things from the past. It has opened my eyes to a lot of different things about why I do the things I do and sometimes it is just awesome to get things out. It is just like Jesus is pealing back layers one by one and walking with me every step of the way. It is hard but it is awesome too.I really wanted to take the program because I didn't want to bring that baggage into this marriage. It is funny - I actually started the program before Mark proposed, so I know Jesus is guiding me.

Other than that - I am hoping to start a job placement at Next Wave. It is only for three months but it give me more experience working with youth and learning how a youth center is runned. I really really hope I get this job. It is ok that it is only 3 months because after Mark and I get married we will be moving into London, and I will be going to school working part - time , while Mark works full time. Life is definetly going.

Are guys really looking for someone to tell them all the things they have to do? I mean why can't they just be their own person? Do you guys really want someone like that? I don't know where it happened but over the years men have been made out to be totally helpless without a women, and to me that is such a put down to men.

I believe men can do something without their wife telling them. I believe that a man can have a life, can have friends, can chill out with their friends. I believe that a man can remember things if they tried to remember. I believe a man can do anything even if their wife doesn't tell them.

I believe that a man can do housework, dishes, clean, and also think for themselves. I understand that when 2 people get married that they help each other, they support each other, they talk to each other - but I don't believe that the mans mind is made up by what he wife says.

Society and other things have made the husband have their part and the wife has hers. If the husband works all day then yeah if the wife is home then she will look after the house but what if they both work? Does she still have to work and do everything too? I don't think it's right and I do think that men can help - I mean isn't that a family - everyone helping each other?

I really hope that there is someone out there that believes this because I will no way tell my husband ( if i even get married ) everything that he will do. Or where to go, or anything else like that. I mean he was his own person before he got married why isn't he after?

Just a couple thoughts - let me know what you think or if it even makes sense.

I think it depends on what kind of love you are talking about. You can love your parents, friends, or family while loving that special someone in your life. There are many different kinds of love, even our love for God should be our first love. And God calls us to love - but if you are talking romantic love then I think you should only really have that kind of love for one person, but if you don't then just take time to see where your heart really is.
But I believe you can show love to anyone by a simple gesture like help, a smile, showing a concern, ect....agape is the greek word for unconditional God kind of love. And we are called to love others with this kind of love.

   

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